Negotiating your first offer
Ask once, in writing, with one clear reason and one number. Here’s how to do it without risking the offer.
Most people leave money on the table on their first offer because they’re grateful to have one, or afraid that asking will make it go away. A polite, specific ask rarely costs anyone an offer. Not asking guarantees you won’t get more.
Before the offer arrives
- Know your number. Ask two or three people in the field what the range really is, and look at posted pay ranges for similar roles. (Primr members can also check Comp intel, the anonymous pay data members share by role and level.) You want a range, not a guess.
- Decide your walk-away. Pick the number below which you would honestly take a different path. Write it down. It keeps you calm.
- Don’t name a number first if you can avoid it. If a recruiter asks for your expectations early, it’s fine to say: “I’m focused on finding the right fit. I’m sure we can land on something fair if it’s a match. What range is budgeted for the role?”
When the offer comes
- Thank them and ask for it in writing. “Thank you, I’m excited about this. Can you send the full details so I can review everything together?”
- Look at the whole package: base, bonus target and how often it actually pays, equity, 401(k) match, health costs, PTO, start date, remote days. Use the free offer comparison calculator if you have more than one.
- Pick one main ask. Usually base. One clear request beats a list of five.
Making the ask
- State one number, with one reason. “I was hoping for base of $125K. That’s in line with what I’m seeing for similar roles, and it’s what would let me say yes today.”
- Then stop talking. Silence feels long. Let them respond.
- Have a second lever ready in case base is fixed: a sign-on bonus, an earlier performance review, more PTO, a later start date, or remote days.
- Tie it to a yes. “If we can get there, I’m ready to sign.” It tells them the negotiation ends when they meet you.
What not to do
- Don’t invent a competing offer. If you have a real one, you can mention it; if not, market data is reason enough.
- Don’t negotiate by text or let it drag out. Answer within a day or two.
- Don’t apologize for asking. You’re doing what every experienced hire does.
If they say no
Say thank you, ask whether anything else has flexibility, and decide against the walk-away number you wrote down. A no on money is not a no on you.
The free negotiation script tool will draft the email and the phone version for you from your numbers.
Not sure what the range really is?
On Primr, verified athletes and veterans share what they were actually paid and answer questions like this under display names.